Tipsy Turvey

It was a rum do,

the way it all turned sour.

He thought it would be a tonic

to chaser round the desk

and finally tie one on her

straight up, or even

land her on her back

in a sudden tumbler -

but she damn well would twist,

proof against all the shots

he thought he was calling. 

It was such a spritzer

to imagine her 

thoroughly hammered.

'Wet your whistle,'

he thought to leer,

and her being stirred

by the dirty insinuation.

But it was his last call.

'Drown your sorrows,' she taunted 

before departing smartly,

leaving him severely shaken.

In her absinthe he obeys,

dejectedly gurgling the whiskey,

not even wondering what she meant 

by, 'Name your poison!'

Another one for dVerse Muse Mixology, using words from the following alcoholic list in a non-alcoholic way. (I'm happy to find out I wasn't restricted to 33 words after all.) But I missed the deadline so I'm sharing it at Open Link Night #189 instead.

shaken           stirred          rum          sour          whiskey        last call
elixir        on the rocks      straight up        twist        round         chaser
back        dirty          proof         tumbler           three sheets to the wind
tie one on         shots         hammered       tipsy           hair of the dog
absinthe          vesper        tonic          kamikaze         spritzer
tie one on       liquid courage       name your poison       drown your sorrows
wet your whistle