This white shell
has whorls and curlicues
crinkling its rim,
and soon I fall
into childhood memories,
tracing them ...
I stand on the sand,
with the song of the ocean
held to my ear —
a hushed sound
as of waves in motion,
but muffled, far.
I'm four, I'm eight,
I'm nearly thirteen,
beside the sea
where I watch and wait
for the tide to turn
and rush to me.
But the white shell
next to my face
sings me back in
with a tidal pull
to this present place …
where lost girls drown.
For Poetic Asides Wednesday prompt: an object poem. Also submitted for dVerse Meeting The Bar At A Slant: slant rhymes, aka half rhymes. This piece is a mixture of slant rhyme and full rhyme.
Very clever use of rhyming here - I like this a lot. Combines the melody of full rhyme with the melancholy yearning of slant rhyme.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Marina. That' a compliment to treasure!
DeleteMuch more romantic and poetic than full rhyme!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Viv, glad you experience it that way.
DeleteI too would love to hear the song of ocean, mesmerizing it is...................
ReplyDeleteThe mixture of rhymes is quite wonderful here--it contributes to the echoing effect of the shell--a muting quality of the half-rhyme--it is a lovely poem generally--the sense of heard selves in the whorls of the shell. Thanks. k.
ReplyDeleteah to be that age again and be by the sea....i love it...i miss the ocean...
ReplyDeletei need to get back there this summer...love me some shells to draw it close too...
Ah yes, when I hold one of those shells to my ear, I too am transported to my childhood days when I did this for the first time.....and was awed by the experience of it, even though I was standing far from the ocean in my aunt and uncle's living room!
ReplyDeleteah, so reminded me of Gift From The Sea by Anne Lindbergh... and love the music of the sea... i placed a large container of shells in my sandbox for the grands... they've made beautiful shell castles... and we even heard the ocean in one... if for just a moment
ReplyDeletei love this pull of the ocean, the pull of time wonderfully combined here...
ReplyDeleteFunny how all children enjoy pressing a sea shell to their ears to hear 'the sea', wherever they live. I also like how you ended your poem, back to harsh reality.
ReplyDeleteYes, I'm glad you understood the ending. :)
DeleteOh - that end hit quite hard ... Lovely walk along the Beaty of the shells.
ReplyDeleteLost girls--only the ones within drown, I hope, and then, I hope, resurrect with each new shell. Haunting.
ReplyDeleteYes, Susan, I was meaning the ones within. :)
DeleteI am a follower and acolyte of Neptune and this poem is so lovely... I sometimes feel like one of the lost girls myself. The song of the ocean helps me rejuvenate and recover every time. Magnetic prose and verse Rosemary!
ReplyDeletenice... i love listening to the shells... the wind and waves in their womb sings so many awesome stories...
ReplyDeleteLive a 100 miles from the ocean, beside an inland sea (Puget Sound), & we travel to the ocean monthly; headed there next weekend. Maybe it just genetic, standing so close to our first home, before our amphibian lives, before our mammal lives--but the seas inside is serenaded by the real thing, & the negative ions are gulped like caviar. You poem was remarkable, nice use of the prompt.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very evocative poem--deceptively simple, yet the experience comes through the linguistic telegraph precisely, clearly, yet lyrically. A great mix of rhymes as well.
ReplyDeleteI found more here in the second reading...simple yet deep..great use of slant form.
ReplyDeleteWow the ending was unexpectedly intense for me. I loved the way you showed the passing of time:
ReplyDelete"I'm four, I'm eight,
I'm nearly thirteen,
beside the sea"
I think I may be confused about the deeper meaning because I had a lighter feeling until the end but now I am wondering if the final line is a metaphor and not to be considered literal?
Thanks for your comment, Gretchen. I did mean that line metaphorically, not literally — meaning that we must re-submerge the inner child in coming back to the present.
DeleteI love the memories through the ages but the ending was unexpected to me with the lost girls drowning ~ Enjoyed your rhyming verses, smiles ~
ReplyDeleteIt was a bit sudden, wasn't it? My lost childhood selves, consigned back to the unconscious.
DeleteYou combined both so well, with a deft hand, nicely done!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful drag and pull to childhood visits to the sea
ReplyDeleteWhat a beautiful poem, dear Rosemary, thank you...
ReplyDeleteMany thanks to all for the comments; so glad you enjoyed this.
ReplyDeletePowerfully evocative. That last line strikes with intensity.
ReplyDeleteI am overwhelmed
ReplyDelete