Instructions to the Bereaved

Many things are just the same.

You still need to get on 

with the physical business of living.

Eat, pee, sleep, wash, and so on.

Do the dishes, put the dishes away ...

observe the normal routines

that made the household function

for two — as it must for one.

You'll notice you still cook dinner, 

still read, watch television, feed the cats,

sit at your computer, write ... do all

that you did before with company.

There is basically only one difference —

and the many small changes

which follow from that. Some you like,

some not. They may be the same.

You spread out in the double bed (you

and the cats). That can be luxurious

or bleak. Taking the other chair, not

to see it empty, you find it better placed.

No-one (except for those cats) 

will nag you now for meals, or when 

to come to bed. Be thankful for the cats!

You too need food. You need sleep.

At first you may decide and plan

activities your Other would have liked,

things you believe they wanted. 

At this point heed the wise advice

your son the other day returned to you,

which he says you gave to him

decades ago, after his father died: 'Don't 

live someone else's life; live your own.'

Poetic Asides April PAD Challenge 2013, 8: Instructional poem.

Submitted for dVerse Open Link Night #91