I had forgotten
crowded Melbourne trains,
but I'm ushered to a seat
for 'special needs'
by a smiling, standing passenger.
(I'm elderly, with luggage.)
Through bits of windows between heads
I see thick bushes, agapanthus blooms
and colourful walls of graffiti.
Middle-aged men stand reading their phones.
There's a loud buzz of conversations
all up and down the carriage.
Many men are wearing hats.
The day is very hot.
My sun-hat's in my bag for now.
I try to read the names of stations
through the crush whenever we stop,
sometimes succeed.
When we get to the city,
my destination,
everyone will pour out.
No, they pile out at Richmond
wearing baggy shorts
and toting drink bags.
Then I know,
this is the cricket crowd.
I stay on board
for one more station
with the quiet and hatless few remaining
in a compartment suddenly spacious.
Submitted, 9 Feb. 2014, for dVerse Poetics — Sketchbook / in-the-moment poetry
Submitted, 9 Feb. 2014, for dVerse Poetics — Sketchbook / in-the-moment poetry
cricket-fans everywhere seem to be the same...love the vivid description and that bit of generosity..Happy New Year Rosemary :)
ReplyDeleteI was certainly grateful for the seat!
DeleteMany thanks, and Happy New Year to you too! :)
ReplyDeleteHello. Great job. I did not expect this this week. This is a great story. Thanks!
ReplyDeletejeux de fille
Thank you; I'm glad you enjoyed it.
DeleteReminded me of my days on the subways in Boston...gosh it would be packed some days...couldn't wait for people to get off and leave some breathing room. Good sketch, Rosemary.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure crowded trains are much the same everywhere. :)
DeleteI always love anything to do with traveling observations...being in the midst of it as you are give you a special perspective...nice
ReplyDeleteYes, having scored a seat, I sat there and wrote. :)
DeleteGreat train ride, Rosemary!
ReplyDeleteIt was, at that. :)
Deleteah yes...you australians love to play and watch cricket... very cool capture of the train journey...i so love traveling by train and just watch other passengers...so interesting... a cool write rosemary
ReplyDeleteHa ha, I am not one who loves it - though plenty do. I, you will note, was not getting off at that station, and was barely aware there was a game happening until I put two and two together and finally remembered there was an important test match happening. LOL
Deletea kaleidoscopic view through the windows of the moving train. Nice idea to arrange your sketch this way.
ReplyDeletethe men are more thoughtful down under it seems. I could stuff a cushion under my clothes and not get a seat :-)
Actually it was a middle-aged lady. :)
Deletedef made me think of the subway...all the chit chat...so many people to take in and experience...i grew into cricket on a trip once as it is much different than our baseball etc....
ReplyDeleteNot all that keen on sport myself - but many are. I don't watch cricket, or even baseball - find it boring, sorry - but can come at a good Aussie Rules footy Grand Final, or even a bit of soccer.
DeleteWell penned. You captured Melbourne and the world of public transport and a culture shock compared to the Northern Rivers:)
ReplyDeleteAha! So where are you, then? Do pm me on facebook if you're there (in my friends list already, I wonder?). I lived in Melbourne 30 years and have visited during my 19 years in Northern Rivers - but it had been a while before this last trip.
DeleteYou've brought train travel to life. I wish sometimes we had more places we could go by train. Truly train travel is a RARE thing here. It is always good when one doesn't have to get off at the most popular destination...more relaxing to have a bit more room.
ReplyDeleteIt's a rare thing in my life too, nowadays. When I lived in Melbourne, two decades ago, I loved it. You can't read, write, crochet, people watch and admire the scenery at leisure while driving a car!
DeleteFamiliar and yet different..you took us through every minute..beautifully done
ReplyDeleteThank you, Jae. I wrote this as it was happening.
DeleteLovely capture, the crowd, the space & noise & what the people are wearing & going into ~ For me its the subway & train rides where I can indulge in people watching ~
ReplyDeleteYes, I used to enjoy that too when I travelled by public transport a lot. In the small town where I now live, it just isn't necessary.
DeleteI can really see you on that train.. I know how it is to be on a hockey train.. he he.. but the warmth... I hope you had air-con on.
ReplyDeleteDo you know, I never thought about it. With all doors and windows closed while travelling, I guess they must be air-conditioned.
Deletethank you for sharing that moment, I felt it. Your words take that trip and share it so that across the globe - I can feel it.
ReplyDeleteThanks. That's one of the great thing about sharing our poetry, isn't it?
DeleteWonderfully sketched to put us right there. The details you capture had me picturing it vividly. Your first stanza gave me a chuckle too! Enjoyed much.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very nice sketch of your journey on a crowded train. What I noticed in the first stanza is that chivalry is not dead. The details you pick out like the colorful graffiti, bushes and blooms are important details that give us the picture of where you are.
ReplyDelete