Just for fun, and because it's the current FormForAll prompt at dVerse. Do pop over there and read Madeleine Begun Kane's delightfully informative article on the subject.
I can tell you, it's harder than you might think! These are not very amusing, and the scansion's not perfect. I might have to practise more at Madeleine's blog where she hosts regular limerick challenges. However, I enjoyed the attempt.
I’m sitting here drinking my coffee
while chewing on lim’ricks, not toffee.
I must have a go,
although I don’t know ...
my efforts might be a bit offy.
There once was a lass called Rosemary
whose visage became very scary
when greeted as Rose —
you’d almost suppose
she was really Miss Mary Contrary.
In fact she is Rosem’ry at home.
The diff’rences come when you roam.
In Gay Paree
now that has a certain aplomb!
Miss Rosemary longs to be thinner
but alas, she’s too fond of her dinner.
It isn’t the meat
that she loves, but the sweet,
as she stuffs more and more of it in ‘er.
I think I have run out of steam
or puff, or whatever you deem.
I’ll tell you the truth:
I am long in the tooth
and it’s time for a doze and a dream.
My own favourite limerick is one my Dad used to recite with gusto:
There was an old lady from Nicaragua
who had her false hair clawed off by a jaguar.
The old lady said, 'Ah!'
The jaguar said, 'Bah!
What a false, artificial old hag you are!'
(I now know it has too many syllabes in lines 1, 2 and 5 — but I love it anyway.)
This post also submitted for Poets United's The Poetry Pantry #95
Some of these poems are autobiographical, some are entirely fictional, and some are a mixture of both. The intention is art rather than self-expression. I don't allow factual details to get in the way of poetry! (I do seek emotional truth.)
They are works in progress, and may be subject to revision without notice. Completed versions appear in my books. Nevertheless copyright applies to all texts found here.
Thank you for your comments. I read and appreciate them all, and reply here to specific points that seem to need it — or as I have the leisure. Otherwise I reciprocate by reading and commenting on your posts as much as possible.