Love and heroism touched his heart.
He was a man who could be moved to tears.
His death caused me to think that we must part
for many years — oh, far too many years.
'He leaves an essence with you,' said a friend.
My smile was wry. 'That's not how it appears.
He's gone, and our communion's at an end.'
But then I read a military tale
of courage under fire, and I found
my heart expanding. Soon my eyes were full,
though I'm a pacifist. I recognised
this was an emotion he would feel.
His essence is still here, I realised.
He's with me as they say, within my heart.
(A disguised Terza Rima sonnet)
Missed linking this to the Form ForAll prompt at dVerse,
so submitting instead to their Open Link Night #96
Missed linking this to the Form ForAll prompt at dVerse,
so submitting instead to their Open Link Night #96
love the way you broke this down with a couplet on either side...it reads really well and natural flow, not forced rhyme...nice slant rhymes in it as well...and a heart felt bit too...realizing that he is still there in essence...well played rosemary
ReplyDeleteThanks, Brian. I appreciate your thoughtful comments.
Deletelovely and so true.
ReplyDeletethis is an interesting poetic form. :)
ReplyDeletei think all soldiers, regardless of nationalities, share a common camaraderie. i find your poem very touching.
Yes I'm sure that's right. As Amy says below, it's not soldiers so much as wars I dislike.
DeleteThis is sad. I;m glad his essence still lingers.
ReplyDeleteI am glad that you recognize his essence with you oftentimes, realizing when you feel as he feels. He is still with you.....in his own way.
ReplyDeleteRosemary, the last part of the poem, about being a pacifist, touched me deeply. I, too, am a pacifist, and I understand why people signed up for the last war... I respect all in uniform, it's their bosses I cannot stand.
ReplyDeleteAs far as the essence, yes, it's never lost, as long as you look to it and meditate on it. Our loved ones live on in the stories we tell... Peace, Amy
Thank you for the wise words, Amy.
DeleteWhat a beautiful homage!
ReplyDeletecrying his tears...love this title and love how you describe the becoming one over the years and now..even with him gone..you're still able to feel what he had felt...beautiful rosemary
ReplyDeleteA well laid out disguised form that falls in welll with the feelings. A slow process of coming to terms finally into a beautiful acceptance of what reality is all about. A very beautiful rendition
ReplyDeleteThis poem resonated with me. Our loved ones never leave for they are always in our hearts. Very nicely done.
ReplyDeleteThat was a perceptive friend, helping you take the next step.
ReplyDeleteOn a lighter note: the terza not difficult enough for you? Now you have to hide it?
Well done. I couldn't find it. But then, my head is a muddle of forms at the minute :-)
Ha ha, yes it can get like that. If you redivide this into 4-line stanzas and a final couplet, and look at the rhyme scheme, that'll give it to you. But the syntax seemed awkward with those divisions, and worked better the way I have it.
DeleteHis essence is still here, I realised.
ReplyDeleteHe's with me as they say, within my heart.
Just amazing how a loved one can hold ones emotional attention that strong. Wonderful take Rosemary!
Hank
I love the ending of the second verse. That makes the poem for me.
ReplyDeleteCheers,
Mark Butkus
it is good to sense essence, even if it is brought on by something so sad... beautiful Rosemary
ReplyDeleteOh yes, indeed it was good. Thanks, Laura.
DeleteMany thanks to all who have left comments. I appreciate your encouragement.
ReplyDeleteRosemary, this is so touching. And yes, one who loved and loves you as much as your husband did and does, is still nearby. His essence is still with you.
ReplyDeleteThank you my dear, I am glad I have managed to convey through my poems how very loved and blessed I have been.
Delete